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Back in high school? -- 07.14.06
We have a new store director (big boss jerk) at the store now... and I'm already on his shit list. I had a feeling this morning that things were going to go really bad with this new guy. He seemed nice at first but then his jerky nature came out. I got in "trouble" three times. First came a stupid remark because a co-worker was looking through my iPod. The store director said that he would take it from me, like I was some sort of child or something. The second time the store director saw that my name tag had a crazy sticker on it. He made me take it off and put some gay-ass pin. Third I got in trouble for talking to one of my co-workers. So yeah, on the shit list already. I've been wanting to get out of this stupid job since day one, but I haven't looked very hard. But now I'm thinking I have to look much harder and put in applications everywhere. I also have to step up that business idea that I had in mind. I need to get out of this job yesterday. It's so completely stupid that someone would treat people like it's high school and they're the principal. How sad is that? How sad is it that someone feels so small inside that they have to pull a lame power trip like that? It's clear that this, and any job, wants nothing but mindless automatons working. That's fine, I'm not going to let it happen to me though.

I remembered a line from the movie "The Shawshank Redemption" after one of the managers said that, according to the store director, a co-worker and I were talking too much.

Andy: That's the beauty of music. They can't get that from you... Haven't you ever felt that way about music?

Red: I played a mean harmonica as a younger man. Lost interest in it though. Didn't make much sense in here.

Andy: Here's where it makes the most sense. You need it so you don't forget.

Red: Forget?

Andy: Forget that... there are places in this world that aren't made out of stone, and that there's something inside that they can't get to, and that they can't touch. It's yours.

Red: What're you talking about?

Andy: Hope.

I thought about how the store director obviously didn't like the smile on my face because, as another co-worker later told me, he saw that I was having too much fun talking to my co-worker. It will always amaze me how much miserable people wish to drag the rest of humanity down to their level of misery. I think that explains why this world is a cesspool of rancor.

Sure, I felt a little down after hearing that, who wouldn't? I'm someone who wears my emotions on my sleeve, even though most people can't tell because I don't outwardly express those feelings. Even now I'm letting go of those feelings and replacing them with good vibes. Tomorrow morning I'll wake up and, to paraphrase another movie line, I will be the warm little center that the life of this world crowds around. I'm not worried, whenever I leave this job I know that I'll be taking something with me everyone at the store now lacks... hope.

End Communication.

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