previous entry   /  newest   /  archive   /  next entry

Lunch date? Not so fast -- 12.05.11
I woke up early today in order to get up, shower, run some errands, and then go and have lunch with TheGirl. But she wasnít able to because of work. So I got nice and clean and woke up early on my day off so I could run a couple of errands and then spend the rest of the day here at home cleaning up my room.

I keep saying Iím cleaning up my room, and I am. Itís not an overnight or one day project. Today I focused on one corner and the part next to my big screen TV. Sony has said that they have some sort of problem with my particular model of TV. Like it could one day just burst into flames. Ohhh Kayy... thatís not something I want happening. So they are sending a technician next week to look at my TV. Canít have dust bunnies scare the technician when he comes in.

So every other week I spend the weekend at TheGirlís place. We hang out Friday night, and then all day Saturday. Wake up Sunday, and I go to work. This week she told me that she hoped not to hurt me but didnít want a Saturday/Sunday sleepover. She needed her space. I understand that. Itís tough because we got into this pattern and though itís not hard to break, the undertones make me wonder what is going on. I think TheGirl doesnít want to burden me with her emotions right now, because sheís feeling depressed. Sheís sad about many things: the holidays, the divorce, her daughterís situation, and her inability to find a better job. All big things on their own, let alone all together at the same time. I want to be there for her, but certainly if she wants her alone time I have to give it to her. Last week I was exchanging txt with a co-worker of ours that she goes hiking with. She told me that she felt I was checking up on her, and told me to trust her. Cynical me thinks thatís a big set-up and trust me means donít trust me. But I have to take her at her word. I know sheís not ďdoing me dirty.Ē But when she pulls away like this it makes me worry that Iím not seeing the signs. Time will tell, of course. I told her I would be there for her and I will be. No matter what. Non-cynical me, by the way, simply feels that she is feeling down and needs that time away from me in order to not burden me with that sadness. Especially since Iím not feeling sad at all. Like I said, time will tell.

As for me, last week was the week of my technology failing me. This week it seems that the technology ship has righted itself.

I think that this cold is finally making its way out of my chest. But not entirely. I woke up feeling nearly 100% today, but then the phlegm came back along with the cough. But, itís less, and when I breathe deep now it doesnít hurt as much. Nearly nothing.

Iím glad tomorrow is payday for me, because Iím down to $40 in my checking account after paying a bill today. :( I hope the paycheck tomorrow is fat. I need it to be fat.

Lastly, I updated the part of my site where I post my photography. Go to IMG_171 > ThingsEyeSee > page 4 >

End Communication.

previous entry   /  newest   /  archive   /  next entry

american ecstasy   /  diaryland