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No soy gay -- 03.17.13
 
Thursday night was a real "adventure," to say the least. †My older co-worker has been acting really strange lately. †Like he comes up and pokes me, tickles me, and has been inviting me over to his house to "sleep over." †I've been able to avoid him, but then this past Thursday night as I was just about to head home when he called me and once again invited me over. †I felt there was something fishy going on, but never did I think that he would come on to me. †The guy is married, has two kids, and meanwhile he wants to see me naked in his shower. †I told him I was flattered, but that I don't swing that way. †He told me I was sending out signals. †What signals?!? †He's nuts. †But, then again I have read friendly signals incorrectly as well. †Still, I knew this whole invite thing felt wrong. Instinctually I knew this wasnít going to end well. And sure enough, he came on to me. In my heart of hearts I really didnít think he would make a pass at me. Mainly because I didnít want to believe he was gay. But I also didnít want to think that the signals he was sending meant that he was gay. I thought he was just being friendly. You think that I would have learned my lesson that when someone treats you extra nice itís because they want to fuck you.

So, now I have to create some distance between this co-worker and me. I mean come on. After a rejection most people get the answer they donít want and walk away, tail between their legs. Iíve had to go through that experience, and it sucks. Boy does it suck. You feel drained, you feel low, you feel unworthy. Yeah, you feel all that and you feel empty, because you had a bunch of emotions wrapped up in this person you had a crush on for so long. And you FINALLY get the courage to let them know, and they donít feel the same way. That sucks big time. But, you mourn the whole thing and you move on. Thatís what we all do. Only creepers continue the pursuit.

* * * * * *

On a good subject, Saturday TheGirl and I went down to have dinner at downtown Disney. We took our monkey with us. At one point Chandaka drove the car. Hereís proof.

Itís silly because weíre not in a relationship anymore, but then there are moments when this little stuffed monkey connects us to that old relationship and how much fun we had at times. TheGirl has an itch that causes her to bolt relationships, no matter how good they are going. Our friendship hasnít been like that yet. Itís different, of course. Weíre not intimate. We are just friends. But this little monkey that I puppeteer brings us closer together. TheGirl says that the monkey is just me. But Chandaka does have a distinct personality that is 8/10ths me, I will admit. But heís also TheGirl when he blows kisses. When he shakes his butt, heís me... definitely.

* * * * * *

Lastly today, another one in a series of dummies that pass through my life. Iím pulling up to a gas pump when I see the car to the right of the pump Iím pulling up to with its drive door open. I mean itís all the way open. A larger car than mine would have a difficult time pulling next to the pump. Hell, I had a tough time pulling up to the pump without hitting this guyís open door. I mean, what the fuck?!? Why leave your car door open when pumping gas?

There is NO reason why the door should be open when youíre on the other side pumping gas. ARGH! People are so inconsiderate of others. That pisses me off more than anything. You donít live alone in this world. You have to share it with everyone. And being inconsiderate is a sure fire way to draw my ire.

End Communication.

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