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What a guy wants -- 2001-01-04
 
I know that I've said that I'm not lascivious person, but that doesn't mean that there aren't times when I do have sexual thoughts. Lately I've been living the life of a monk, almost literally, except for the part about reading the bible every day. It's not so bad actually. What it is is relaxing and calm. Yet, I'm in a state of limbo when it comes to my feelings towards possibly pursuing a relationship at this time. Part of me wants nothing more than an understanding, smart, and witty woman to be by my side forever and ever. Does such a woman exist? I know many do, though the one's that have come close to that have had little or no interest in me. Sad, I know, which is why I live the life of a monk today. Nevertheless, like I stated before, that doesn't mean I don't have sexual thoughts. Right now the only thing I want is to have a woman sit on my face while I eat her out. The thought of a woman's thighs on my ears as I taste her sexual secretions is a thought that permeates my mind at this instant. I went over to my friend Anne's this New Years to watch the ball drop in Times Square. We had a couple of drinks, which only serves to make me loose some of my inhibitions. Well, there was a point when I forgot that Anne is one of my dearest friends. I saw her not as a friend, but as the smart and affable woman that she really is. Then I snapped back into reality and thought to myself that attempting to make a fool out of myself by making a pass at her would only serve to make our friendship, which I cherish immensely, a little awkward. A little awkward, what am I saying, it would serve to make it completely awkward. I love her too much as a person and as a friend to ever make that mistake. Let that be a lesson to you all, don't drink! Serves me right for drinking... that's no way for a monk to act.

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