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Things I Dread -- 2004-04-05
I dread when the phone rings. Nowadays the phone ringing puts a crink in my neck, and a shiver up my back. I hate the phone ringing these days, because most of the time I don't want to pick it up. There are some exceptions, like when Suiza Angelica calls. Her I'm OK with, because she always has something interesting to say to me. With everyone else it's always about some favor. It's always some silly thing that I don't want to deal with. Hence me not answering the phone a lot of the time.

I dread math homework. Right now I have a mound of math homework that will be due at the end of the week. I have zero inclination to do it. I hate math homework, because it feels like busy work.

I dread crowds of people. I think this aversion to clubs, crowds, and places where a lots of people are going to be, has gone up a notch. I used to just not want to deal with these things. Now I seriously HATE having do deal with them. I feel that if I don't want to deal with them, that I shouldn't have to. In short, don't invite me to a place where there is going to be a large crowd. I'm not going to want to go.

I dread the weekend being over. Those last few hours of the weekend feel so sad. The minutes counting down makes me feel so bad, because I know that I have to go to sleep, and wake up the next morning and return to the grind. That just makes me feel bad. Because most weekends I don't get much done.

I dread Mondays. It's the start of the week, and the end of my fun. Back to the grind, which I hate. People are too wound up. They rush everywhere, and it's not worth it. I hate rushing. But, I'm taken in the current of the weekday stream. The current is too much to swim against sometimes.

I dread stupidity. I hate it when someone's stupidity trips me up and causes me to attempt to catch myself the rest of the day. It's a total mess when someone trips me up because they can't figure out the easiest thing. What is it about getting older that makes people completely incapable of learning even the simplest things? I know people who are older that are able to pick things up easier. Because they keep their mind sharp. But, the majority of people aren't interested in keeping their mind sharp. I so don't want to be someone who lets their mind go in their later years.

I dread the pain in my stomach. It seems to be getting worse these days. It acts up whether I eat, or not. Matter of fact, it starts to hurt about a half hour before I start getting hunger pains. The pain starts right in the usual heartburn area. It's a slow burn that creeps its way up to my throat.

These are the things I dread right now.

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