Right now I feel like I want to leave here and come back in a long time. Maybe not come back at all really. There really isn't anything here to hold me, except loyalty. I've always valued loyalty, over everything else practically. But, since my Grandmother died there is nothing to be THAT loyal to around. In my mind I've already left. Now I just have to move in that direction. Moving to the new school is a good start. It's a new place, new in every way. I don't know anyone there, and they don't know me. How wonderful does that sound to you? To me it sounds absolutely blissful. I feel like I'm going to pass out right now, from how sleepy I feel. But, I want to finish writing this. In short, I'm done trusting people. I'm done with giving people my loyalty. I'm done with sticking my neck out as far as possible. I'm done. And I'm done with trying to please everyone. I can't do it, no do I want to. I've come to this conclusion thanks to several people. They taught me it's better to rely on yourself, and never put your faith in others. Thanks, but no thanks. Your half-assed friendship is not needed. |